Deciduous shrubs such as forsythia, honeysuckle, mock orange, spirea and weigelia are simple to prune.  Remove all of the oldest branches to ground level, leaving six to twelve of the strongest and best.  Take the opportunity to also cut away all suckers and weak growth, as well as any dead or diseased growth.

That old favourite the common lilac needs to continually have those suckers kept back to as far below the ground as can be reached with pruners or knife.  Cut back also those similar weedy growths that spring unwanted from the major branches.  All lilacs also need to have the dead blooms or seedpods nipped off at the first set of fat buds located just below them.  These will become next season’s blooms.

Now that coniferous evergreens have completed their growth, shear the new growth back by one-half.   Do not cut into the older, previous season’s growth lest you cause severe damage.  It is the new growth only that undergoes this treatment.

Broadleaf evergreens such as rhododendrons need only the spent blooms pinched back in a similar fashion to the lilac, removing the seed pods to just above that fat pair of buds below them.

A singularly ill-informed individual (and one obviously not a member of the great gardening fraternity) once made a statement to the effect that a weed was merely a plant whose virtues were yet to be discovered.  This is an absolute load of manure!  Weeds may be correctly defined as plants growing where they are not wanted.  Weeds suck up moisture and nutrients while producing nothing desirable.  They occupy valuable space, crowding out more valued plants.  They act as hosts for numerous obnoxious pathogens.  They are to the garden what the Senate is to Parliament.

Once out of control, weeds threaten to take over.  Now it is time to commence the attack that will defeat them with ease and least effort.  The hoe is the weapon of choice.  Sharpen the business end with a flat file.  Use it weekly to scuff just below the surface through all beds and borders.  The time for this is a few hours after dawn.  The now rootless weeds cannot the re-root themselves.  Moreover, by catching them before they have set seed, it prevents their spread. In short, catch ‘em young.

In the lawn, the knife is a useful implement.  In the event of nervous neighbours with thoughts of Hitchcock’s Psycho forever instilled in them, you may wish to choose a dandelion weeder.  Those suffering from gardener’s back will appreciate a long-handled model.  The odd obnoxious weed that escapes these attacks must be removed by hand.  It was, after all, Rudyard Kipling who pointed out that “Adam was a gardener, and God who made him sees that half a proper gardener’s life is spent upon his knees.” Kipling may not have been thinking exclusively of weeding, but he missed out on long-handled gardening tools.

It is a tribute to their manufacturers that most mowers continue to function after a fashion with a minimum of maintenance.  Few modern gardeners are unconcerned with the environment.  Yet equally few concern themselves with even a modicum of lawn mower maintenance.

More and more city gardeners are converts to reel mowing machines.  More familiarly known as “push mowers”, they should have their metal parts lightly wiped down with an oily rag after each use.  Annually in early spring, professional regrinding of the blades is necessary.  Many local hardware stores offer such a service. 

Home power lawn mowers are almost invariably of the rotary model.  A blade revolves horizontally at high speed under a protecting deck, driven by a gas engine or electric motor.  It is this blade which seldom -if ever- receives the attention it deserves.  Sharpen several times each season by first disconnecting the spark plug cable or power cord, then, on a layer of newspaper away from the lawn, tip the machine on its side.  Remove the blade, put a new edge on it using a flat file, then, before remounting, balance on a pencil to make sure one side has not been left heavier than the other.  If the blade balances level, all is well, if not, use the file on the heavier side until equilibrium is gained.

Remove all debris from below the deck until returning the blade to its shaft.  Cleaning out the air filter will vastly prolong the life of the engine, as will removing clippings piled in and around the cooling fins and elsewhere.

More on mowers, along with information on lawns and other ground covers may be found in Green Side Up by Wes Porter (Fitzhenry & Whiteside $14.95).

The scientist knows the as Sciurus, the Eastern Grey Squirrel, which may be grey, black or even- south o’ the border- white.  However, to many a keen Toronto gardener they are tree rats, if not worse.  The usual litany of complaints flowed in this spring.  Having dug up bulbs last fall, they ripped the blooms off of those that survived.  Shrubs and even rose bushes were reportedly stripped of the bark at the base, which sounds more like mice than squirrels.  Bird feeders were reduced to squirrel cafeterias.

Taking the easiest first, many bird feeders are on the market that claim to be squirrel proof.  Most of them actually are.  Check out wild bird supply stores.  Do-it-yourself (DIY) enthusiasts should check out Ms. Hart’s book below, which has an entire chapter of designs.

The commercial repellent Rapel seems more and more difficult to find in stores but works well.  So does Blood Meal Fertilizer, although frequent use could lead to over-nitrification and pollution.  Not a few frustrated gardeners have resorted to the use of hot pepper dust.  This has led to accusations of squirrels which have scratched out their burning eyes.  Whatever the pros and cons of pepper, these accusations remain unauthenticated.  The true problem with pepper, like blood meal fertilizer, is that it is very short lived in the garden environment.  Prolonged moisture exposure soon breaks them down. 

The presence of a pet dog or cat is a distinct discouragement to Sciurus, but few such family friends show any real enthusiasm for permanent garden guard duty.  In real desperation it may be necessary to resort to live trapping, then releasing in a local ravine or further afield.

Much more on the lifestyles of squirrels and the discouragement of their activities will be found in Squirrel Proofing Your Home & Garden.  This most interesting book by Rhonda Massingham Hart is from the well-known stable of Storey Books and retails for $17.95.  Ms. Hart also wrote the favourite Bugs, Slugs & Other Thugs. 

Interestingly, in her famous diary Mrs Simcoe (wife of Ontario’s first Lieutenant-Governor) recorded her gastronomic appreciation of settlers’ “black squirrel stew”.  About the same time in Siberia they were exporting squirrel skins to China to be turned into coats, while the hair continues to make superior artists’ paintbrushes.

Last month, the Nunavut Legislative Assembly passed a motion to make the purple saxifrage the official flower for the new northern territory.  The Saxafraga comprise of some 400 species and many garden varieties of mostly perennials best suited to well-drained soils in open, sunny areas.  In fact, that botanical name hints at saxum (rock) and frango (to break).  In other words, they appear to be bursting apart the rocks, on whose crevices they often grow, which will thrill rock gardeners.

Ambitious gardeners, perhaps having seen and heard the famous Molson’s “I Am Canadian” ad, may be interested to attempt the balance of provincial and territorial floral emblems.  All except that of Quebec are native plants, something that might be worth a thought.  The official flowers are as follows:

All except (obviously) the latest addition were celebrated on Canadian postage stamps in a series issued 1964 through 1966 of 14 stamps (the two extra being of maple leaves).  The entire set is known to philatelists by the designation “Scotts 417-429A” and should be available at collectors retail outlets for under $5. The originals have a face value of 5¢ each.  Thirty-five years ago, not only was mail delivered on Saturdays as well as weekdays, but it frequently arrived the day after it was mailed, and without a postal code at that.  The service may have changed but the floral emblems have not.  They take a little searching for, but should be available, although the Lady’s Slipper Orchid of P.E.I is very difficult to grow and the Pitcher Plant requires a bog.

One of the joys of city gardening is that the older homes and large, mature trees give a sense of permanence yet to arrive to the suburbs.  The addition of a glaringly new planter can stand out like a single dandelion bloom in a spring lawn.  As many planters can attest, this may indeed be the age of plastic.  Fortunately, there remain those with the taste and, let us admit, the depth of pocket to install the real thing, be it cast iron, stone, or one of the many modern, excellent imitations of the latter.

These may be aged by a simple process and a little patience.  Rome wasn’t built in a day, they say, and a planter will take a few weeks to take on the patina of apparent age.  Italian and French forgers of ancient statuary buried their ersatz creations in manure heaps for a few months, and then dunked them in the millpond for a similar period of time.  We can do better with yoghurt.  Smeared over the pot’s surface, it attracts the spores of mosses, lichens and moulds if stashed in the shade for a few weeks following application.  Some like to assist the process by rubbing it with a piece of moss or lichen.  It makes no difference whether plain or flavoured yoghurt is used, but if this does not find favour, then beer or even water from the goldfish bowl are said to be equally efficacious.

After a few years of use, clay pots become splotched and smeared with white patches and streaks.  These are the result of natural salts on the clay as well as the soil within the container leaching out.  Imitate this by mixing two parts white exterior latex paint with one part of water.  Brush on and then rub the surface with a moist sponge to leave any ornamentations filled with white and perhaps the surface streaked.

The same technique can be used to “age” stone or concrete containers with mould, substituting a moss green latex paint for the aforementioned white.  A blue-green latex applied in the same manner with leave the appearance of aged copper.

Don’t give up if you already have plastic planters, but use oil-based paints diluted with paint thinner in the same way.  This, however, creates much mess and smell.  Wear old clothes and rubber gloves, and spread newspaper before settling down to work.  Oil paints and thinners kill grass and other plants.

Free concerts Sunday 7, 11 & 18 June, 1:30-2:30 p.m.: more information from 416-392-6910.

Free every Tuesday evening through to October from 4 p.m. until dusk.

Meet across the street from the Grenadier Restaurant; confirm program details by phoning 392-1748.

6 June: Trees: meet 6:45 p.m.

11 June: Seed Workshop: bring gloves, meet 1:15 p.m.

20 June: Faerie Lore: meet 6:45 p.m.

25 June: Art in the Park: meet 1:15 p.m.

11 June: 19^th Century Herb Gardens. Free lecture at Richters, Hwy 47, Goodwood, Ont.  2 p.m.

25 June: Herbs and Health Day, Richters, Hwy 47, Goodwood, Ont.  9 a.m.- 5 p.m; free seminars.

Free guided walks.  Wear suitable clothes & footwear; bring camera, notebook, binoculars; children are welcome but no pets; all walks are TTC accessible.

1 June:  Gerrard Prairie – nature walk.  Meet 6:45 p.m. NE corner Victoria Pk/ Kingston Rd.

8 June:  Taylor Creek – nature walk.  Meet 10 a.m. outside Victoria Park subway station.

17 June:  Mt Pleasant Cemetery – trees.  Meet 10 a.m. (morning only).  Belt-liner entrance to cemetery on Merton just east of Yonge; don’t miss this one!

18 June:  Taddle Creek Watershed – garden tour.  Meet 2 p.m. Bathurst subway station.

22 June: Moor Park Ravine/ Brick Works Park – nature walk.  Meet 10 a.m. SE corner Mt Pleasant Rd/ Moor Ave; bring lunch and water.

24 June:  Morningside Park – nature walk.  Meet 10:30 a.m. park entrance W side Morningside N of Lawrence E; bring lunch and water; rugged walk, be prepared for wet places; many plants.

27 June:  Glen Stewart Ravine – nature walk.  Meet 6:45 p.m. SW corner Queen E/ Glen Manor Dr.

29 June:  Earl Bales Park – nature walk.  Meet 10:30 a.m. at community centre in park- E side of Bathurst, S of Sheppard W; bring lunch & water.

You too can meet one of these exalted city reps of the common taxpayer at the following locations:

1 June:  Milton Berger/ Joanne Flint, 4-8 p.m. Don Valley Golf Course Service Yard, 4200 Yonge St.

3 June:  Case Ootes, Michael Prue, Jane Pitfield, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., East York Civic Centre.

10 June:  Bas Balkissoon/ Raymond Cho, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.  Scarboro Transfer Station.

17 June:  Irene Jones/ Blake Kinahan, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.  Sherway Gardens, 25 The West Mall.

22 June:  John Filion/ Norm Gardner, 4-8 p.m.  Goulding Community Centre, 45 Goulding Ave.

24 June:  Lorenzo Berardinette/ Brad Duguid, 10 a.m.- 2 p.m.  MacGregor Park, 2231 Lawrence E.

Haven’t seen one in decades, back when we used to call it a bush hook.  Should have guessed that it would be in the Rittenhouse catalogue, where it’s called a Woodman’s Pal.  If you’ve inherited a jungle garden in the city or are heading north to the cottage, don’t be without one of these wonders.  They’re $79.95 and worth every penny.  Call 1-877-488-1914 or hit www.rittenhouse.ca. 

John Valleau of B.C.’s Heritage Perennials wrote the Perennial Gardening Guide several years ago, with eight colour-illustrated plants per page.  The complete book can be had for around $10.  Often hard to find in T.O, it is welcome news that Plant World on Eglinton near Royal York is carrying it.  It’s the best book of its kind on the subject, as is Vermont gardener Edward C. Smith’s tome entitled The Vegetable Gardener’s Bible.  It has some 300 large, colourful pages on vegetable gardens large and –thankfully for the city- small.  Bountiful instructions, explanations and suggestions leave only one puzzle: why is it that vegetable gardening is not more popular?  It will be with this book from the good folk at Storey, VT.  It can be bought for $36.95 here or hit www.storeybooks.com.

The now-famous Molson commercial known to all as I AM CANADIAN! has spawned many an imitation.  But gardeners seem to be strangely absent from all of these.  In an effort to make amends for this, City Gardening offers the following statement:

It will be of interest to some that John Deere has on a sale of lawn equipment.  An LT133 Lawn Tractor could be yours for $2,799.  Not in the same class as the 15-ton 4046 John Deere owned by Farmer Schneiderman of Stoney Plains, a half-hour west of Edmonton.  Last year Mr. Schneiderman used his 4046 to the detriment of a Skidoo trespassing on his property.  The LT133 might be capable, however, of devastating the company’s T105C filament trimmer which, like snowmobiles, is capable of creating dubious decibels.

  A deep thought, from the British New Scientist journal:  what would you do if you saw an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

  ”Lichens are as inconspicuous as squirrel dung, and every bit as valued by humankind.  Putting aside their doleful lack of feathers and lamentable want of big, soft, sensitive eyes, it is difficult to understand why lichens should not be allowed to join the spotted owl and the marbled murret as rallying points for environmental reform”.  So says Tom Goward, a lichenologist from Clearwater, B.C., who has just saved the cryptic paw lichen –Nephroma occultum- from likely extinction.

  The large-headed woolly yarrow was considered for inclusion in their “red list” of endangered Canadian plants by the Committee on the Status of Endangered Species in Canada, known to enlightened gardeners as COSEWIC.

  Clearcutting of 2,000 hectares of a Saltspring Island, B.C. forest by a developer (Texada Land Corp.), threatens the largest remaining Garry Oak meadow left in Canada.

  An African plum tree, threatened with extinction from over-harvesting of its medicinally valuable bark, has been declared a protected species by the 150-nation Convention on Trade in Endangered Species (CITES).  This is wonderful news for Prunus africana since those who are literate throughout its range are renown for the attention they pay to protection of life, plant, animal or human.

  Mycologists revise the total number of fungus species they expect to exist to as high as 13 million.

  Sheila Copps announces she self-medicates herself with echinaceae and evening primrose and –coincidentally- wants $100 million of taxpayers money to fund a school of alternative medicine in her hometown of Hamilton.  Ms. Copps continues to be blissfully unaware of the dictum that she who diagnoses herself has a fool for a patient.

   The U.S. Department of Agriculture has determined that increased CO2 doubles the notorious ragweed’s pollen production to an average of 10 grams, instead of the 5 grams it was pre-industrial times, not good news for hay fever sufferers.

   The House of Commons Environmental Committee recommends phasing out pesticides for ornamental use over the next 5 years and severely restricting others used on food crops.  “Dandelions don’t pose a threat to health,” said Liberal MP Charles Caccia, “but herbicides do – particularly to children.”

   If continued research by scientist Mohamed Abou-Donia at Duke University Medical Center in Durham, North Carolina, is successful, doctors will be able to confirm poisoning by organophosphate pesticides.  In damaging the nervous system these cause –according to Abou-Donia- antibodies to be produced in those afflicted.

   The U.S. Food and Drug Administration announces that companies will be required to notify them prior to marketing genetically modified foods.

   Rather than pollen, pesticides or other products, the U.S. National Allergen Survey (conducted by the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences) discovers that the bedding in 45% of American homes contains enough dust-mite allergen to cause allergies to develop.

   Masamtsu Ichihashi and his colleagues from the Kobe University School of Medicine, Japan, offer hope for UV-exposed gardeners.  Slapping on virgin olive oil after exposure reduces skin cancers in mice dramatically.  Regular olive oil has little effect.

   This month, Halifax city council is scheduled to vote on banning pesticides from the municipality.  After 70 years of arguing, this major city of the Maritimes continues to dump its untreated sewage directly into the harbour.

   Last month the environmental club at a Walkerton secondary school, stirred up by environmentalists and politicians, launched an awareness campaign about lawn pesticides as a threat to the environment and the water system.  “Lawn chemicals are a phony health scare; E. coli is not,” writes Terence Corcoran in a Financial Post editorial.

   A reader of Britain’s New Scientist weekly journal discovers a bottle of organic pasta sauce with a “best used before” date of 2 March 0069.  In other words, as the magazine points out, it’s good for 8,069 years.

   North American ginseng’s largest supplier, Chai-Na-Tao Corp., manages to eliminate a $28 million debt by restructuring, gain $5 million in new working capital, and lose its president and CEO Gerry Gill in the process.  The ginseng giant is based in Langley, B.C.

  Increasing warm springs are causing trees to absorb more carbon in Canada’s deciduous forests, according to a study from the University of British Columbia.  Summer has little effect, but the increase in spring is complicating research into the link between climate and the carbon cycle.

  One of the many reasons that fewer migratory birds are returning these days is that their habitat is being reduced in overwintering countries such as Mexico and Colombia.  This is thanks to coffee bushes now being grown there in full sun rather than shaded by trees, as was done previously.  It was these trees that provided the cover required by the birds.

  British researchers warn that the effects of the Chernobyl disaster will last far longer than was originally projected.  In parts of Russia, for example, the consumption of wild berries and fungi –an important part of the country’s culture- will have to be restricted for a further 50 years.

  Hard on the heels of Prince Charles’ fulminations against genetically modified crops comes the news that the Canadian subsidiary of the Dutch seed developer Advanta accidentally exported genetically contaminated canola seed to Europe, where it has been happily growing for two years.

  In the wake of the Walkerton water tragedy, Greenpeace conveniently forgets its call for banning chlorine but announces it will commence legal action against the Dutch firm Advanta, which imported genetically-modified Canadian canola seed into Europe two years ago.

  Janet “Bee” Nevil, an 87-year-old grandmother who requires a cane to walk, was one of four protesters arrested when they defied a court order and blocked logging trucks on Saltspring Island, B.C.

  A third of the Amazon rainforest will be dry grassland or even desert by the end of the century, according to a British study presented at the European Geophysical Conference.

  A reader of the British journal New Scientist found a small label stuck to her new “professional flower cutters” that read: “No moisten negative.  Endure highly mild.  Nil poison nature.”   She does not believe they were made in England.

  Annoyed by her 74-year-old neighbour who persisted in using a noisy leaf blower, a Yonkers, NY woman repeatedly ran him over with a car in his own driveway.  This stopped the noise but has resulted in a charge of murder being laid against 40-year-old Clunie Berbard.

   Too many cups of kava herbal tea have led to the charging of a California Federal Express driver with driving under the influence.  The tea is prepared by infusing the powdered plant Piper methysticum in hot water.  The San Francisco resident had drunk between 8 and 10 cups of the beverage with church friends.

  NASA proposes that the first astronauts landing on Mars will set up a greenhouse and hydroponically raise beans, carrots and tomatoes, amongst other crops.  This will reduce the necessity of carrying a large cargo of pre-packaged food while improving the crew’s health, both physiologically and psychologically.  Cornell University has devised what are said to be tasty recipes.

  Monarch butterflies for release at weddings are sold for $125 per dozen in Toronto.  Many couples choosing them are said to order 100 or more.

  An invasive Argentine ant that has spread across the southern U.S. owes its success as a major pest to inbreeding.  Instead of fighting for lebensraum, they recognize each other as relatives and so compete less.

  Male fruit flies can smell females with their legs as well as their antennae, according to research by Claudio Pikielny of Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in Piscataway, New Jersey.

  American biologists have discovered that insects reduced the many legs of their millipede-like ancestors to the conventional six by turning off two genes, Ultra bithorax (Ubx) and abdominal-A (abd-A).

  Researchers from San Francisco State University reveal in the science journal Nature that a species of blister beetle that infests beehives arrives in them by hitching a ride on the bees.  First, the beetle larvae imitate female bees.   Then, when the male bees attempt copulation, the larvae hop on board, transferring to the female bee the next time the male feels the urge.  The female delivers her parasitic passenger back to the home base, the hive.

  A particular species of nematode found in Ontario parasites slugs, causing their demise.  Infested slugs sport a collar formed by the nematodes just behind the head.  This is said to be “noticeable”.  The biological control distributor MicroBio’s Tom Hinks is hoping to hear from commercial growers who spot such slugs.  Somebody has to do it.

  Scientists with the U.S. Department of Agriculture have discovered the active chemicals in a strain of wild corn from Argentina that repel the female moth of the European corn borer, a major pest.  There are about 20 such chemicals, but the most important is a hydroxamic acid known as 2-hydroxy-7-methoxy-1, 4(2H)-benzoxazin-3(4H)-one (mercifully abbreviated to HMBOA).  Then there is DIMBOA, the 2,4-hydroxy variant of HMBOA.

  City of Toronto forester Richard Ubens and his staff asked city council to pass a bylaw permitting them to enter onto private property to search for the feared Asian long horn beetle.  This, hopefully, will prevent Toronto from losing many of its trees as well as saving the city the $2-million-plus bills facing New York and Chicago, who are battling the same beetle.

  A Clearwater, Florida pest exterminator promotes his business by releasing 25 cockroaches with tiny bar codes glued to their backs.  The prizes for finding any one of them include $1.5 million and a 2000 Volkswagen Bug.  “Next year,” says Howard Bright, the owner of Anti-Pesto Bug Killers, “we may bar code mice, rats or lawyers.”

  Ants were the cause of death of an 87-year-old woman in a Sarasota, Florida nursing home.  1,625 bites were counted on the unfortunate victim.

  After a decade of obscurity, the brown spruce longhorn beetle has been discovered munching its way through red spruce in Halifax’s Point Pleasant Park.  The illegal immigrant from Europe is thought to have jumped ship in nearby Halifax Harbour when it arrived after hiding in wooden packing aboard a container ship.

  ”Stir fried with a bit of garlic,” says the London, England’s Daily Express, “locusts are very similar to prawns and are rich in protein.”

  Tiny rotifers baffle biologists as the latest research claims that they have not had sex for 40 to 8 million years.  It is generally believed that eschewing sex results in extinction.

   Alpen cereal –sold in England- offered a free tree deal.  Each arrived in a package printed with planting instructions.  Just in case city slickers did not understand, these said, in part: “This tree is deciduous.  It is not dead.  Leaves will appear in spring.”

   Caring for the lawn becomes dangerous in Toronto when a car jumps a curb at 9:30 in the morning, strikes both a man working on his lawn and his dog, and is only stopped by hitting his house.  Both man and dog sustained broken legs and, like the lawn, will take some time to recover.

  Arlene Bynon, writing in the National Post, reveals that somewhere in the country north of Toronto there used to be a female acquaintance of hers who dressed for gardening in nothing but a thong.  Another attractive lady in the area boasted of mowing her lawn wearing nothing but a pair of gloves.  Perhaps she was a member of the American Association of Nude Recreation, who have a web site at www.aanr.com and offer the North American Guide to Nude Recreation for $24.95 (US).

  200,000 tonnes of fertilizer will be sent “out of humanitarian concern and brotherly love” from South Korea to their starving Communist neighbour, North Korea.  This follows the 155,000 tonnes sent in 1999, in which year, by way of return, North Korea inadvertently exported a secret stealth submarine and terrorists to its southern brethren.

  Combing his Encyclopaedia Britannica, nurseryman Jim Hole reveals in the Weekend Post that a litre of human male urine contains 10 times as much nitrogen as a similar amount of 20-20-20 fertilizer, an equal amount of phosphate, and twice as much potassium, along with calcium and magnesium.

  Fertilizer can be fatal.  An Indonesian ferry overloaded with more than 60 tons of fertilizer and cement- along with vehicles and over 100 passengers- sank in the Banda Sea, resulting in the loss of about 40 lives.

   A 1932 Picasso abstract painting of his mistress holding a pot of tulips is auctioned in New York for US $28.6-million.

  A Wal-Mart garden centre manager, David Reznicki, is quoted in the National Post as saying “tomato plants are very popular”.  One must congratulate him on his perspicacity. 

  Sandy McClelland, from one of Home Depot’s garden centres, observes that apartment dwellers are gardening on their balconies.

  Gardening is proclaimed a “social sport” by one Laura Berman, program co-ordinator for Food Share, a Toronto community garden association. 

  The number of community gardens in Toronto rises over 7 years from 26 to 81.

  Forget Italian plastic clogs.  The “in thing” is to bang mason bee nests in a sunny spot near flowers.  Margriet Dogterom, who achieved her doctorate at Simon Fraser University studying these bees, has further information on her web site at www.beediverse.com/temp.  According to Ms. Dogterom (a mason bee enthusiast), the buzz is that these bees are far more efficient than honey bees when it comes to pollination and, better still, they don’t sting.

  This summer, Toronto aims to add 60,000 native trees to the 3,000,000 trees already on public land in the city at a cost of $1million.  Volunteers wanting to assist by planting a few can call 392-7482.

  ”Please call 395-0490 if you see anybody molesting a moose,” pleads Toronto’s Mayor Lastman.  The fibreglass sculptures dotting the city’s parks and other public areas have become targets for vandals.  Sponsors pay $6,500 each for the moose, and the money is donated to charities and the arts.

  ”It’s time that I roll up my sleeves and fight the cats,” says Toronto Councillor George Mammoliti, who is better known for his dislike of trees, but now undertaking a campaign against cats.  “All these cat owners let their cats run freely; if they see me in their neighbourhood, they should keep their cats indoors.  If I have to hide behind the gardens and tomatoes and meow to get them into cages, I’ll do it.”

  The National Post’s Arlene Bynon admits in print she travels “with a shovel and a balaclava” to remove plants from vacant lots, roadsides and ditches in the countryside around Lake Simcoe for her Toronto garden.

  Frank magazine satirizes rose growing in Rosedale, thus acknowledging that gardening has “arrived” and is worthy of their dubious attentions.

  Federal Natural Resources Minister Ralph Goodale attempts to promote a new variety of white spruce by sending two-foot specimens in special boxes to each and every one of the 301 Members of Parliament in Ottawa.  The cost was a mere $800 per Piceae tree of taxpayers’ dollars.

  Ottawa’s Millennium Bureau of Canada handed over $4,380 of taxpayers’ money to produce 4 sets of 30 slides and 100 leaflets on cranberries in Truro, N.S.

  The Department of Indian Affairs donates $10,000 to the Ottawa Tulip Festival “to highlight native culture.”

  Ottawa bureaucrats have been drafting the new federal pesticide legislation since 1996.  Due to tabled by Health Minister Rock shortly, it apparently still does nothing to protect those most at risk: children and wildlife.          

  Kim Campbell, Canada’s Consul General in Los Angeles and former Tory Prime Minister, spends $450 of taxpayers money on flowers to decorate her home when entertaining 60 assorted reporters, Canadian Film Board flaks and other obscurities at an Oscar luncheon costing over $10,000.

   The image of the Virgin of Guadeloupe- discovered by a bibulous man last December- on a black olive tree growing in a Bonita Springs, Florida front yard, grows until it is 10 inches high.

  We are proud to bring you British gardening at its best.  “Houseplants are for ornamental use and should not be consumed,” reads the label on plants sold by Sainsbury’s, a well-known chain of supermarkets.

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